I Choose Me

This morning I woke up seven minutes before my final alarm, and as I rolled over to soak up those last few minutes, I thought to myself, "I could just press snooze one more time, it feels so good in here.  What's 15 more minutes?" and then I heard another, stronger, voice say, "No. I choose me," And it was right. By getting up on time, I was choosing a more relaxed, less hectic morning, a clearer mind, a healthier, more thoughtful daily meal plan.  I was choosing to be a Sydney that followed through on her promises to herself.  Like making time for #The100DayProject.  I wouldn't be sitting here right now if I had snoozed my alarm, and what a shame that would be.  And sitting here now, clearing my mind of busy thoughts, enjoying a cup of coffee before my day begins I don't regret my decision to choose me.  And I bet I never will.

I had someone come to me a few months ago and admit that they needed to choose themselves over a relationship with me.  To choose, after a string of prioritizing jobs, friendships, and partners, to do the work to build a surer foundation for their sustained happiness, rather than try and fit on someone else's.  In my own selfish way, I was sad and hurt by their choice (and I would be for a while), but my primary feeling was one of pride.  Choosing yourself is one of the most important and terrifying things one can do.  Many read it as selfish.  But anyone who has done the work knows the truth.  You can't serve others with an empty cup.

Choosing yourself is like so many other things, once you open yourself up to that perspective, to that work, you notice people doing it everywhere.  The positive energy you put off attracts more of it back to you.  I reached out to a dear friend this week on a whim, and what did I find? He's choosing himself! And as a result, he's completely re-evaluating his life. Through our conversation, I got to bear witness to his excitement, his joy, and his fears. The best part? I got to offer him encouragement and support because my cup was full!

Few things make me happier than watching a friend I've known for years choose to bet on themselves and work to become the person I've known them to be all along. But there is actually one thing better.  Becoming a confidant and touchstone for that person as they move through their journey. Knowing I have the tools to help myself and be useful to someone else. Simply because I chose me. Now that's what it's all about. - xo Sydney